It's just me, 'cause I love to eat  
 Fudge and Twinkies and deviled ham  
 Who's real flabby? Yes, I am!  
 Every picture of me's  
 Gotta be an aerial view  
 Now my doctor tells me  
 There's just one thing left to do--  
  
 Grapefruit Diet (Diet)  
 Throw out the pizza and beer  
 Grapefruit Diet (Diet)  
 Oh, get those jelly donuts out of here  
 Grapefruit Diet (Diet)  
 Might seem a little severe  
 Grapefruit Diet (Diet)  
 I'm gettin' tired of my big fat rear  
 Blow, flatty!  
  
 Well, I used to live on chocolate sauce  
 Made sumo wrestlers look like Kate Moss  
 Walked down an alley and I got stuck  
 I got more rolls than a pastry truck  
 When I'm all done eating  
 I eat a little more  
 When I leave a room  
 First I gotta grease the door  
  
 Grapefruit Diet (Diet)  
 Can't have another eclair  
 Grapefruit Diet (Diet)  
 I gotta decrease my derriere  
  
 I'm on a Grapefruit Diet  
 I'm on a Grapefruit Diet  
 I'm on a Grapefruit Diet  
  
 No more pie now  
 No more creme brulee  
 Lay off the gravy  
 And souffle  
 No french fri-yi-yies now  
 No ice cream parfait  
 Mr. Cheese Nacho  
 Stay away  
  
 Oh, I think I'd sell my soul  
 For a triple patty melt  
 But I need a boomerang  
 When I put on my belt  
  
 Grapefruit Diet (Diet)  
 Lay off the 3 Musketeers  
 Grapefruit Diet (Diet)  
 Until my big booty disappears  
 Grapefruit Diet (Diet)  
 Eat'em till they're comin' out of my ears  
 Grapefruit Diet (Diet)  
 'Cause I haven't seen my feet in years  
  
 I'm on a Grapefruit Diet  
 I'm on a Grapefruit Diet  
 I'm on a Grapefruit Diet